December 23, 2010

The Dreaded Anonymous Comment

So what's the big deal about Anonymous comments? Do you hate them? It seems like most bloggers have an immediate dislike for people posting Anonymous, well pretty much only when they have something negative to say. It does seem like most people that do have something negative to say do so anon though, right?

In all honesty, I once posted an anon comment on a post and it didn't end well. I decided then if I have something to say, I'll just say it as MonaZ. I do have to bite my tongue sometimes though because what I have to say isn't what someone wants to hear so I refrain from commenting at all in that case.

I don't know, I suppose if you allow anonymous comments on your blog, sometimes people will post anonymously. People seem to take it as an insult and need to find out WHO it is, etc.  Guess what, there's an anonymous feature there for a reason. Somehow when someone leaves a less than kind comment, anonymously, bloggers take it really personally.

I guess it can be cowardly to comment anon, but sometimes it just should be accepted. If someone has something to say about you or your blog, maybe just take that in and think about it. Either they have a point and you can learn from it or they're a jerk and not worth worrying about. I don't get a lot of anonymous comments but when I do, I don't delete them, I just reply to them like any other comment. I don't care who it is.

21 comments:

  1. I allow comments that insult my blog or myself, but delete ones that are insulting to my other visitors.

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  2. I recently got an Anon comment. I could have taken it negatively, but I chose to learn from it. The anon comment was spot on too. I wish they had not posted as Anon because I would love them to expand on their comment! I chose to publish the comment. I think I'm going to address this soon on my blog!

    I find that if I want to say something negative, then it shouldn't be said. If I am itching to say it, then I will! :-)

    Most the time, a comment which starts with, "i don't want to offend, but...' or "I dont mean to upset you, buuut", then I know that they are going to offend and upset! LOL funny stuff

    :-) nice post

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  3. Salam =) I don't mind it if people wish to be anonymous but I don't like silly comments such as:

    "Your wudhu is invalid if you wear nail polish." Uhm hello, I wear nail polish when I can't pray?!

    "No offend but why do you cover up and then post photos of yourself online so any random guy can see?" Hmm, because it's my choice?

    If I think these anonymous commenters have the right intentions I will not delete their comments be they negative or positive, but some of them clearly don't have good intentions. I like my blog to be a place of positivity not negativity.

    If they wish to advice me for the sake of Allah they can kindly send me an e-mail and not attack me publicly. That's not the right way to do da'wah.

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  4. I actually stopped allowing anonymous comments when someone started saying some really cruel and hurtful things about me, my husband and my unborn baby. I was pregnant and hormonal at the time and the comments really upset me.

    Maybe I'm in a better place now that I wouldn't take such comments to heart. I guess it depends what is actually said.

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  5. Mona, you shouldn't refrain from commenting if you see something questionable or wrong with something someone posted on their blog. I, myself, have posted on one or two blogs as an "anon" but I decided after that if I want to say something, I won't do that.. but I figured that person would've taken the points give "better" from an anon than from me...

    I don't delete anything either if people have some thing negative to say... I've had one or tow them before.. and I address the issue at hand if they're right or wrong or I explain myself if I feel they misunderstood what I was trying to say. And what makes people think everybody should agree with what you have to say all the time???

    Yeah, some people will hunt you down if you use "anon" and posted something they didn't like.... it's nothing to get crazy about though- it should be taken lightly... and if you can't take it, remove the option.

    Hope you and your family are doing well! Smooches!!!

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  6. I'm like you; don't really see what the big deal is, and plus, every blogger has the option of allowing anonymous comments or not on their blog. If it's really offensive, they should just disable anon comments. Once in a while when I have something "negative" to say, I'll just post as myself, but I'll just be straightforward; no sugar coating, but no insulting/immature behavior either (of course). But even then, I find that most bloggers still clump you into this category with haters and idiots; most people don't like to deal with opposing opinions.

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  7. Salaam ya'll. The only anon I ever had was spewing anti-muslim venom and being rude to me and my family. I allow anonymous comments but UNLESS they denigrate Allah or His prophets and messengers, or try to propogate their religious views. I have Christian readers and family of course but they don't try to give dawah through my page.

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  8. Anonymous4:50 PM

    I actually only post using anon, because I have no clue how to set up these openid things and when I try with google, the never seem to work, so I'll post anon, but sign my name. It is the polite thing to do.

    Most of our mothers taught us that if you don't have something good to say, simply don't say it. Now, if you are trying to educate, or help direct someone perhaps it is ok, if you sign your name and allow an interaction of thoughts and ideas. But insulting and belittling another OR their beliefs - Never!
    Lizzegrl

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  9. I removed the anon option a while back when I got a sort of stalker type on my blog and added moderation. It really did the trick. The person always uses the same name so I can block him or her right away when I see it. And the two other people who have never said a single positive thing on my blog are identified... The comments are always bordering on deletion, but not quite there... So knowing that they always comment this same way, I was able to tell them with confidence that I wanted them to get lost. If they were anon, I wouldn't know if it's 15 different people or just one... It helped clear that up.

    People really do hide behind anon and on my blog, it was best to remove the option.

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  10. Organica, that's a good policy. If someone was rude to one of my readers, I'd delete it if the reader/friend wanted me to but otherwise I'd just deal with the comment.

    Houda, Thanks, I hope there's a spin off then!

    Shahira, Haram police comments are always a pain.

    Amalia, I don't blame you one bit. Obviously that person was just evil.

    Empress Anisa,Yea, I don't have anything negative to say very often but I guess if I do and I should in a constructive way.

    UmmOmar, yea, I agree, some people just want people to stroke their egos and agree with everything they say.

    Umm Aamina, Alaikum alsalam, I agree that's crossing the line.

    Lizze, Of course I don't mean Anon's who sign their name and I love getting comments from you. Blogger can be annoying. Yea it should be about dialog and respect.

    Candice,I only delete spam comments. Alhamdulillah I haven't had many trouble makers so I guess I can't say for sure I'll always do that.

    That's the beauty of it. Every blogger is in charge of their own blog and their own comments and is free to handle them however they chose. I just thought this was an interesting topic after reading a post recently.

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  11. Salams,

    Alhumdulillah I never had negative comments before (yet LOL). But there is email to me saying that I am a hijabi but why the picture of me smiling? *lol*
    And i dont follow the scholars who believe that niqab is obligatory.
    I never use make up too much, never plucked my eyebrows and all, but still there ppl who would just HATE you for everything *lol*

    well, as long as they dont insult our Islam, our Allah and our Rasulullah, they can say just abt anythg.

    HUGS!

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  12. Anonymous5:27 AM

    I prefer to post anonymously for two reasons

    1) Like somebody else said, all these different methods and systems and accounts gets overwhelming

    but primarily

    2) I just can't stand the thought of using my real name and then having somebody be able to google me and make all sorts of assumptions about me based on my comments or maybe they will learn things about my personal life that I don't necessarily want millions upon millions of complete strangers to know.

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  13. I once commented on a blog under an alias, just ONE time, but that was because I was narrating some negative things about my past to a blogger I felt needed to hear it so she could learn a lesson from it. Since I am an actual blogger, I didn't think it was appropriate to reveal my true identity, not because I'm trying to be fake or put on a facade, but because in islam we're taught not to reveal our sins/mistakes, and I don't normally talk about my past in such detail unless it's to give a lesson and then certainly not in such a public forum as a blog. So yeah, posted under and alias :)

    So I can understand why some people would post by other than their real identity.

    With that said, I don't really see the point of the anon feature though...I just guess ppl could use aliases if they wanted to hide their true identity?

    I do believe in being upfront though, and have never posted a "disagreeing" comment anonymously...I just don't care if the author or other commenters know who I am (*shrugs shoulders*) Not only do I stand behind my words, but I try to be as gentle as I can so that I don't sound judgmental or rude or otherwise negative. Of course people may "hear" your words/your voice in a totally different way than you intended (*shrugs shoulders again*), so what do you do? (don't know!)

    Anyway, I guess all in all, anon/alias commenters don't bother me at all, unless, as some of the others mentioned, the comments were degrading to Allaah or the Prophet. Like one time a person left a comment about the prophet using four-letter cuss-words...I was NOT having it!!!! Deleted, ala toule! hehehehe :)

    What I find interesting though, and quite childish, is when people delete your comments that aren't rude exactly, but just aren't in agreement with their point of view...it's like, what in the world are you blogging (putting all your thoughts/feelings/ideas on the internet for millions of people to read) for???

    ...Oh yeah, that's right, to wax your ego (smh).

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  14. I get all flustered when a friend posting as anon asks me something about my kid or me. Lolz. I don't have a great following so i know mostly people who are reading are coming from my very private facebook list but I'd prefer knowing who I'm answering to :)
    How about the one who posts under an ID then I write back to them explaining why their judgmental comment was uncalled for, and then they say "my account was hacked I didn't say those things." how do I then tell her that it sounded like her husband must have used the account because he got pissed at something I wrote about men?

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  15. Salam.
    wells, I dont mind anonymous comments until and unless they arent offending &\or abusing & disrespecting.
    they are kinda fun. umm only 'kinda'
    haha
    love your new template. how on earth u make em ????? :o goodwork tho :)
    tc
    sanz

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  16. Rialive, Don't you know muslimah's aren't supposed to smile!? ;)

    Anon, And that's you're right, nobody has to know who everyone is. People should just take the comments for what they're worth.

    Asiya, That's understandable. I agree, it could just as well be an alias and it doesn't make a difference. I agree on people who delete any comments that disagree with them!

    Ayesha, You know, you might have other readers, like anyone reading my blog can click on your name and read your blog so it can be anyone. About husbands using a persons account, wow, does that happen!?

    YellowMango, lol, thanks for noticing :) It's a lot of work sometimes but it's fun. Let me know if you want any template help.

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  17. Oh dont remind meee i have anonymous stalkers who wont stop posting negative comments abt me and my blog t first it bothered me but then i felt flattered i men they cant stop visitin my blog and r o interested in knoing my updates. I get more blog visitors :)

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  18. Anonymous12:08 AM

    I forgot to say I REALLY like the new template Mona! ;0)
    lizze

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  19. Dinos, Lol, that's one way to look at it. :)

    Lizze, Thanks, me too! :)

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  20. I don't have an issue with it in general, there's some valid reasons someone might use it. I've seen it used by people who don't have accounts. I've used it by accident or when my comp wouldn't let me log in (always mention its me, but still).

    Rude comments on the other hand... I don't care if they're anonymous or not.. if you wouldn't say it to someone's face prob not the best idea. I got attacked by a lady (could have been ladies, but sounded like the same person) on my blog several times while I was pg and pp. Caused a lot of drama because my hormones were all over the place and my kids were involved. Not cool.

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  21. MamaKalila, I'm with you, Anon doesn't bother me, rude bothers me but I don't care if your anon or leave a name, rudeness is not appreciated.

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Thanks for commenting!