November 11, 2010

Blah

I figure I don't have to wait till Sunday to write about this. It's my blog and I'll whine if I want to!

I'm just feeling really rather blah on the dieting front. My scale is working, it was just the rubber foot on on the bottom that had come off and gluing it back on fixed it. It's actually accurate and I checked by weighing on a proper medical scale at a pharmacy. I actually gained this past week. I know it's just a week and I should let it go but it really bothered me. I haven't felt like writing down my food these past days and I'm just all around worn out about it.

I guess you could say I hit my melting point. It couldn't have stayed all slap happy, hey this is easy! Whohoo!, forever.  I wanted a big slice of chocolate cake! Basically I was like the typical angry dieter except I din't fall of the wagon in a binge of some twisted kind of revenge on the scale? Myself? But it wasn't for lack of wanting.

I just got angry that I've been following the plan, not eating the things I want and walking everyday for an hour and had an asthma attack one day, really killing myself sometimes and in the end I end up gaining?! For what? Why bother, I thought. I'm eating so much less and better than I used to, I feel like I should be seeing real results. I know everyone is going to say I shouldn't be a slave to the scale but I just am. It makes me feel like the deprivation, what I'm doing is worth it, when I see a loss.

Maybe it's just that Eid is coming up and we're going away a few days and I feel like I probably won't be as diligent about my points so it's a kind of  aw screw it mentality. I know I won't blow it completely but I'll definitely enjoy myself a little. I just don't feel completely in it right now and I hope I'll be motivated to be excited about it again after Eid break.

12 comments:

  1. Assalaam waliekum.
    Alhamdiallh. You need keep it up. You're going to gain some weigh in the beginning due to building muscle then insha'allah you'll start burning fat better. Once your muscles get better, your body can burn fat faster.
    May Allah SWT Make your exercise routine & good eating habits easy and successful.

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  2. I agree with Gail. You should not give up now. I have read once that when your brain realizes that you are trying to control your food intake, it sends signs to your body not to loose weight and fat in case you are trying to deprive yourself or if there is starvation going around...this might sound funny and unrealistic but I read it in an article.
    Heads up Mona, and keep up the good work. And remember you have reached good results so far.
    Go out girl, enjoy your Eid and leave the guilt at home before you go to your Eid trip.
    Eid Saeed to you and yours.
    Love

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  3. Yeah - seriously agree with the other two. It's nothing to worry about at all! Muscle weighs more than fat, and walking will be gently toning your body. That's why I don't like to get hung up on numbers, they don't really mean anything.

    If you're confident enough you could take pictures and look at how you've changed every month or so? You will end up weighing less in the end but there's so many variables - you lost so much at the beginning, your tone and shape will be starting to have an effect now since that takes a few weeks to kick in (that will be the weight gain now) and then there's water weight too. So stay motivated :)

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  4. Hang in there sis :) You can do it! Losing weight or healthy eating/living is a lifelong goal... just think about eating/being healthy and dont beat urself up for enjoying some things *once* in a while

    Everytime I decide to lose a few, I find it falls off quickly at first then stabilizes... not so encouragin but relatively normal inshaa Allah (though I dont know the medical reason)

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  5. :) Dont worry I gained weight too.. I felt shattered but then got more motivated to stick to my diet.. anyways you seem like you gained weight because of Muscle tissue and sometimes when you weigh yourself on a full stomach and wearing alot of clothes it can show that you gained but you actually didnt.

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  6. Thanks everyone, I'm not quitting but in a little slump. Thanks again, all. :)

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  7. Salaams! I second the muscle gain as I had that happen too! Insha'Allah that's what's happening for you. A second point that may be heartening is that if you use an inhaler (and I don't know if it's the same for you as it is for me) you may be retaining a bit of extra water. My inhaler leaves me bloated, although it's not always that noticeable.

    Finally, and this is weird perhaps but true, your body could just have responded differently to something you ate and not have 100% cleared your system yet.

    Good luck! I saw a Hello Kitty display in Target and thought of you.

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  8. I'm glad you are not quitting :) Don't please because I'm just starting mine and you the one who motivated me to do so!
    Keep going :)

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  9. Mona,
    I think you look beautiful. So, try not to focus on the numbers and keep making healthy choices. The food you posted looks healthy and delicious, even the bagels. Oh, and that table with the flowers had such a nice presentation. The park pictures show a nice day with family. Your world looks very beautiful to me from over here. Try not to put a number on it or yourself. You deserve nice things and that healthy food looked nice, so I hope you feel more blessed than deprived after you look at what you posted and see: Yes, this is all so nice.
    - Courtney

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  10. We have been cheating on our points on and off. We have on days (counting) and off days...where we eat badly, but maybe not as badly as before. Im having trouble staying completely motivated myself.

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  11. We all have our bad days, weeks, etc. Don't be so hard on yourself. Think of this as something that will only push you to work harder towards your goal.

    You know you can do it! =) *cheering you on*

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  12. Mona,

    Stick to how you feel not how much you weigh. You can feel it in your clothes and you everyday feelings.

    I am so proud of you.

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Thanks for commenting!